2. Walking around with a piece of paper and pencil in your hand.

3. Sitting in a corner and doodling in a notebook (make sure no one can see what
you’re doodling)

4. Having extended conversations with people working in different rooms – each will assume you are taking a break when actually you’re moving from break to break the
entire day.

5. Feigning interest in Boss’ hobby and talking to him about it – be it anything from
obscure art house films to toe-nail clippings.

6. Volunteering for field work – any field work, getting coffee, getting the company
car fixed, recce a stretch of road we mightsend a guy to sell magazines on, etc.

7. Engage one of our more rambling co-workers in any sort of argument, and let it run
its natural course.

8. Entertaining the visitors in the waiting area with impromptu stand-up acts.

9. Learning the ancient japanese art of Stareibana – the art of tasteful web browser bookmark arrangement.

10. Hiding in the toilet – wifi enabled laptops make excellent companions.

The Funniest Number
(a reality show)

In a walk in contest, the number 8 was conferred the funniest number of all. Zeroand 6 were disqualified; the latter for impersonating 9 and the former for coming rolling in instead of walking. The number 8 was declared the final winner for being infinitely funny on its side. The 27th letter discovered.

In what is being termed the greatest discovery since the invention of the alphabet, scientists have come across the 27th letter that might just solve the riddle as to why Englishis a funny language. Found buried in one of the valleys of W, the fate and the pronunciation of this latest entrant to theinsular and exclusive 26 member club, is the topic of intense speculation among the bookies. Bets are on as to its position among the alphabet.

The periodic table before the revolution….source RD mehta chemistry book. pg43
PERIODIC REVOLUTION
A bloodless (though some of the metals got a little rusted) revolution led by Base
metals against the hegemonic and insular attitude of halogens, noble gases and
rare earth metals led to the rearrangement of the periodic table. Students were
pleasantly surprised to see the metals arranged in one simple straight,long line,
with the protons(which give them their valency, hence their position on the table)
distributed equally amongst them, in their chemistry books. PAINTING THE EVEREST RED

June 13,2009:
The Maoist government in Nepal and the Communist
Republic of China have signed a historic pact to paint the
Mt. Everest red. After 16 rounds of negotiation, a final
settlement of socialist solidarity was reached, where in China was to paint its side of the Everest with the help of Coca Cola, while Nepal would cover its expenses by asking foreign tourists for donation… China’s original plan to cover up the Everest with dead Tibetan monks was rejected after someone pointed out
that their robe was the wrong shade of red. This momentous event has caused consternation in the corridors of  South Block, as India has always considered Mt. Everest an integral part of India’s pop culture. Speaking on conditions of anonymity, Mr Rakesh Sharma, a bureaucrat has termed this an infringement
of India’s sovereignty. Speaking on Nepal’s tacit approval of the pact, Mr Sharma said, “Nepal is too small to take such a big decision.” India is considering raising the issue at the
United Nations. ]]> http://randommagazine.in/2010/04/bullshit-page/feed/ 0 http://randommagazine.in/2010/04/random-take-on-13/ http://randommagazine.in/2010/04/random-take-on-13/#comments Thu, 08 Apr 2010 10:04:04 +0000 admin http://random.mediologysoftware.com/?p=3000 As you probably have not noticed this is our 13th issue … the infamous number 13 has a long notorious history of  being an iniquitous number (it is bad) … but does anyone know why? Does anyone really know what the big deal is? Does anyone even care? Well, here is where we tell you what’s what … HERE’S THE TRUE, TRADITIONAL, HISTORICAL VERSION, OF WHY 13 IS CONSIDERED TO BE UNLUCKY
(Excerpt from A Concise History of Bullshit, by Sir N.T. Ramsey-Row) (…) There are many different stories in many different cultures involving the unluckiness of the number 13, but they are all stolen from here – In the ancient Indian Sultanate of Undhairgunj, the 13th of the month used to be the day the Sultan would go out into the town with a full procession, and perform a ceremonial stand-up act (The Ritua was said to not only be an appeasement to l  the old Gods of the lands, but also be helpful to the subjects’ health.

Also, the Sultan always wanted to be a standup comedian but his father pressured him into taking over the family business – you can read all about it in the Sultan’s Autobiography ‘Harems and Hecklers: A Royal Joke’, Out in Bookstores November 13, Arbit House India)

The ceremonial stand-up act would not only keep the subjects standing up all day to listen to the hack, but also involve tedious rituals like laughing out loud, going ‘Who’s There?’ for each knock-knock joke, and stoning the heckler (who was chosen beforehand by a council of 13 courtiers) They would then be forced to ask the Sultan for an encore thirteen times, until he would agree, and then finally had to pay 13 asharfi door charge as they leave.

Understandably the subjects grew tiresome and rebellious, and when the revolution came, all hints of the number 13 were removed from the sultanate and replaced with ’12A’ (…) 13 IS NOT ONLY UNLUCKY, BUT A SHIFTY, IRRESPONSIBLE SORT OF CHARACTER …HERE ARE SOME SUSPICIOUS ACTIVITIES YOU SHOULD WATCH OUT FOR … 1. Any number added to 13 would be Odd! (if the number you add is even… if youadd an odd number the result will be even … maybe)

2. If a Friday falls on the 13th of the month, people always notice! If it doesn’tthey don’t even care!

3. Regardless of hairiness, there are a total of 13 hairs in your butt-crack and ear canal!

4. 13 is the average number of steps in an average Mongolian Opera House staircase! 5. It takes 1300 standard licks to finish one of Mrs. Chadha’s Phalse Pop lollipop … but only 13 bites!

6. Sacrificing 13 virgin maidens to the Dark Lord would add 20 years to your life and also a brand new Chevrolet Impala!

7. If 13 people bitch about you behind your back, you will get the hiccups!

8. 13 is the number that comes right after 12! 9. There were 13 people at the Last Supper! (if you don’t count the waiters)

10. 13 people stabbed Caesar to death! (Not Julius Caesar, Ignacio Caesar, a notorious Mexican bandit)

11. If your heart stops beating for 13 seconds, you will die! (do not try this at home)

12. If you bring the two digits together they form a letter of the alphabet! (Guess which one? Send in your answers via SMS to *8^&@)

13. There are 13 facts in this list!!!ZOMG!!11!!! NOT FULLY CONVINCED THAT 13 IS ONE WEIRD LITTLE NUMBER? TRY THIS EASY EXPERIMENT … -    Write down the number 13 on a piece of paper, fold it in half four times and sit on it
-    Then, think of a two-digit number, with both digits different and odd, between 10 and 50
-    Write that number down on another piece of paper, different from the kind of paper you wrote the     number 13 on in the first step
-    Add 13 to the number, and your age
-    Subtract 7
-    Multiply by two
-    Halve
-    Add 7
-    Subtract your age, and the number 13
-    The number you have is 35
-    Which is what you originally thought of
-    The number on the piece of paper you are sitting on is still 13 …
-    Coincidence … or No? ]]> http://randommagazine.in/2010/04/random-take-on-13/feed/ 0 http://randommagazine.in/2010/04/death-to-june-2009/ http://randommagazine.in/2010/04/death-to-june-2009/#comments Wed, 07 Apr 2010 05:46:28 +0000 admin http://random.mediologysoftware.com/?p=2789

June has long been impersonating a month in the Gregorian calendar but has anyone ever actually seen this so-called Month ‘do anything remotely month like?

Are there any UNIQUE SEASONAL PECULIARITIES in this month?

Are there any IMPORTANT ANNIVERSARIES or COMMEMORATIONS?

Are there any FESTIVALS in this month?

I couldn’t come up with any… Can you?

Despite bribing May every year, we find ourselves in the shittiest(june is the who approved potty training awareness month) and worthless(june 28th is the poor’s day) of months. We are sick and tired of having to deal with this month year after year after year even the poor swede(see “death in June, on the other page, not on this page”)), who sleeps throughout the month of June, just to avoid it. we at random have thought up of a ‘Death to June’ campaign.

people of all nationality, race and culture are welcome to make this campaign a resounding success.*

*people born in June better keep away.

The first person to seriously consider killing off June was the late John Lennon. Hey Jude was originally called “Death to June” and the lyric went something like this-

Hey June

you better be scared

you’re such a sad month

we gonna kick ya.

but since Brian Epstein had his birthday in June, he slept with Lennon(hence those gay rumours) and persuaded him to changethe lyrics. The eventual lyrics still called for June’s death, but was wrongly interpreted as a song addressed to his son Jude. and guess what? June escaped unharmed but John never wrote an allegorical song again.

JUNE TRIVIA…

June is a month(this statement was a running Roman Senate joke in the )

June has 30 days in it.

That’s as far as june thinks, half the numbers with may and the others with july.

July lives in mortal shame of replacing june, atleast for the first fifteen days.

For our plans for june, check the other page. ]]> http://randommagazine.in/2010/04/death-to-june-2009/feed/ 0 http://randommagazine.in/2010/04/simpoo-around-the-world-3/ http://randommagazine.in/2010/04/simpoo-around-the-world-3/#comments Tue, 06 Apr 2010 12:23:45 +0000 admin http://random.mediologysoftware.com/?p=2776

SIMPOO AROUND THE WORLD
SIMPOO IN AFRICA ]]>