Snapshots from the 2008 Olympics August 2008, The Abominable Indian Delegation Arrives in Beijing Tibetan Tests – All far-eastern players must undergo a word association test to determine where their ‘sympathies’ lie. 100 m Dash Incident – The Indian Delegation’s secret sprinting weapon (a thief who instinctively runs faster on hearing gunshots) had a false start, where he ran straight out of the stadium…with all three medals. Closing Ceremony – A dance show by Akki and Jackie, to promote their upcoming films.

INDIAN INSTITUTE FOR RACIAL PROFILING AND ETHNIC STEREOTYPES SPOTTING GUIDE NORTH-EASTERNERS: DO: Try to sound like you care about their issues. DON’T: Ask if they know the only other NE’n person you know. Ask if they want dog with their rice (It is understood…) Bitch about Bob Dylan within earshot. Ask when their visa expires PECULIARITIES: Will always be more fashionable than you. EUROPEANS: DO: Hide your children. Point it out if you are a Christian, just like them. DON’T: Rape them. Try to sneak a look at their pink nipples. Set out to prove their country of origin inferior to your own… it isn’t. PECULIARITIES: Talk loud to ethnics. SOUTH ASIANS: DO: Stay out of smelling range. Remember which hand is for eating with and ...

If you’ve heard about the Law of Averages, you’ll know that even the most pathetic loser of all time is bound to win some time or the other. Therefore…everybody can win. And it takes only an idiot to tell you how to win (and a lot of idiots are making money out of it). Losing consistently, on the other hand, is an art that only a few have been able to master. But, now the author of such bestsellers as The Drunk Who Never Had a Ferrari to Begin With, I Stole Your Cheese and The Neighbors’ Leftovers for the Soul is here ...

Parties… we all love them. Akbar did when he chilled out with his Nine Jewels, Paris Hilton did when she forgot to wear undies to Kanye West's bash… Parties have always been of historical importance… and all you have to do is throw one. But it's dangerous business! Chances of your roof falling down and the water in your pool turning pale are immense… and that's why we are going to be your 1)     Do Not Tear The Egg Cartons From The Wall – They Make The House Sound-proof To Neighbors 2)     No Food Fights, They Only Look Good On Tv 3)     Cat ...